Performance Anxiety: It's Not Just for Men Anymore

Often when a penis-having person experiences a sexual dysfunction like the inability to get an erection, the inability to maintain an erection, or problems with orgasm, one euphemism we as a society use to sidestep discussing the embarrassing specifics is to say “he/I/they have performance issues" or "performance anxiety.”
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Now, if this person is in a sex therapist’s office (or on a Zoom call with a sex therapist during a global pandemic), that is the cue for the sex therapist to conduct a thorough assessment. Questions like “What do you mean by that?” “Do you have problems with getting an erection? Keeping an erection? Both?” “Do you come when you want to?” “Have you always had this problem during your whole sexual life or is this a recent development?” “Do you have this problem with every partner?” “What have you tried to treat this?” are some of the questions the client should be ready to be asked and answer.

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